Paul Austin Kelly – Big Bad Rap lyrics

Let me rap a little bit about the Big Bad Wolf
Because in chasing little pigs he made a big bad goof
You know it would have done him better to remain aloof
But his appetite was getting in his way

When he met the little pig whose house was made of straw
You know he never should have said a wolf was at his door
He could have said he was delivering a pizza, sure
But no, his appetite was getting in his way

So when he's huffin' and a-puffin' up his big bad chest
That little pig jumped out the window, he was heading west
And Wolfie he was pickin' straw out of his vest
Because his appetite was getting in his way

So then he runs until he comes upon that house of twigs
Slides his eye up to the keyhole and he sees two pigs
They're just sitting back and laughing in their twiggy digs
And Wolfie's dreaming of a piggy-wig flambé

So he was poundin' at the door and screaming “Bacon, Ho!”
“I'm gonna slice you, dice you, here I go!”
The little pigs are truckin' out their twiggy digs back door
‘Cause Wolfie's appetite was getting in his way

By the time he was arrivin' at that house of bricks
There were the Three Little Pigs just gettin' their kicks
You know that Wolfie's just a-jumpin' to get in his licks
And put some Piggly-Wiggly sausages away

And since he couldn't huff and puff and blow that house away
He's climbing up on to the roof and down the chim-nye-aye
But hey, he slid into a pot of boiling water, Ray!
And the piggies feasted on him all the day

Now you should try to learn a lesson from this Big Bad Dope
If you've got appetites like him then keep them on a rope
Just keep a calm cool head and then you've got some hope
Of keeping appetites from getting in your way
And that's my Big Bad Rap
My Big Bad Rap
Big Bad Rap
Yeah, my Big Bad Rap