Eazy-E – Merry Muthafuckin' Xmas lyrics

Come on over Hunnie
And give your uncle Dolamite a kiss
Well, what you want baby?

Would you tell me a story?
You want me to tell you a story?
Hell, yeah
Me too

Yes, Hunnie I'ma tell you a story
About the bad ass Eazy-E
He was drinkin' whisky and gin at the age of three
Listen and listen well, he's a bad muthafucka

Gimme that goddamn book
Here let me read you this one, Christmas in Compton
It was a silent night, yes, a holy night
Until Mr. Claus turned into Santa muthafuckin', right?

Deck the halls with balls of holy
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
'Tis the season to be jolly

Merry Christmas, muthafucka
Merry muthafuckin' Christmas and a ho, ho, ho
While I'm ridin' that cot under the missile toe
Now dashin' through the snow

In a candy right top 6-4, over the hills I go
Laughin' at this hoe, nuts on rich and rings
Makin' me feel right, oh, what fun it is to know
That I'm gonna get this pussy tonight

So ring them bells, ring them bells
She's takin' it all the way, oh what fun it is
To watch her suck my dick this way
Hey, ring them bells, ring them bells

Shes takin' it all the way, oh, what fun it is to nut
While she's suckin' my dick, oh, yay
'Tis the season to get busy, Compton crime lick
And I'm smokin' on this stick

Ho, ho, ho, come sit on my face
I'm mean lap and tell me
What you want for Christmas, ho, ho

I want a slay ride, a cd player
A fifty rum, [unverified] and I'm gonna c**
A vcr [unverified] some porno flicks
Rudolph, the red nose reindeer

[Unverified] like a everlastin' gobstopper
[Unverified] poppa, I dig a ho
Crack a dough by the nuts, oh
[Unverified] fuckin' in tha snow

I made him drop to his knees
Yeah, you know what's up
I said here's some candy canes, eat 'em up
[Unverified] bonapatite with a condom in a tree

All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
My two front teeth, my two front teeth
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
Yo, where's ya rhyme, tell me Buck Wheat

Buck Wheat is a waskal, that's no Christmas
And all the toys, boys and girls, fuck ya wishes
I got happy over joy in this muthafucka
No indo under my tree, so Santa be a sucka

[Unverified] when I was young, I was the only kid
Who had enough guts to be good ole hearin' on the East
I'd stay awake just to let America know
That Santa was a fake

I used to believe in Saint dick when Elvis was alive
But all the fuckin' bullshit got played when I was five
Years, oh, just stay young, bold datin'
Singin' 'Silent Night' Carolin' recitin'

Now all I want for Christmas is my indo wreath
I got my two front teeth, uncle Eazy be the [unverified]
Just spread me a leaf, little kids don't cry
When you find out the Santa Claus is just a fuckin' lie

On the third day of Christmas
My homeboys gave to me three pounds of indo
Two birds of cocaine
And a muthafuckin' K bitch

Eazy-E, oh, Eazy-E
Show us how you treat those bitches
I saw mommy fuckin' Eazy-E
Close the door little bitch
I'm gettin' these draws
I'm a tell my daddy if ya ass don't stop

I don't give a fuck
I'm gettin' christmas caught
Ho, ho, ho, and away I go
Oh, Saint Nick got a dick like a ho
Well, where's this [unverified]
Shut the fuck up, bitches
And go back to sleep

Yo, black, what you want for Christmas?
Yo, black I want a job [unverified] corn on the cob
But a nigga will eat them chicken
And chitlens, watermelon, corn bread and some food

Whos climbin' in my window, smokin' up indo
My carin' and high make a high know
Yo, black, what you want for Christmas?
Y, black I want some cash
So I can buy some indo, some chronic and some hash

A rump, pa, pump, pump
A rump, pa, pump, pump

Merry muthafuckin' Christmas
Merry muthafuckin' Christmas
Merry muthafuckin' Christmas
And have a fucked up new year
And have a fucked up new year
And have a fucked up new year
And have a fucked up new year

You bitch

And they all went to prison
And lived fucked up lives ever after
The end